Tuesday, December 24, 2013

The Truth About The Christmas Angel….

MERRY CHRISTMAS MERRY CHRISTMAS MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM LANCASTER,OHIO……

DSC_0085 (2)a

Not very many people know this::

When four of Santa's elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Santa began to feel the Pre-Christmas pressure.
Then Mrs. Claus told Santa her Mother was coming to visit, which stressed Santa even more.
When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two others had jumped the fence and were out, Heaven knows where.
Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the floorboards cracked, the toy bag fell to the ground and all the toys were scattered.
Frustrated, Santa went in the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered the elves had drunk all the cider and hidden the liquor.. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider jug, and it broke into hundreds of little glass pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found the mice had eaten all the straw off the end of the broom.
Just then the doorbell rang, and an irritated Santa marched to the door, yanked it open, and there stood a little angel with a great big Christmas tree.
The angel said very cheerfully, 'Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't this a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?'
And thus began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.
Not very many people know this.

xmasangel So, now you know…..Have a great one….

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Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Speeding Ticket

MQTlogoa This should at least make you smile.. This came in an email and made me LOL…

SPEEDING TICKET... I got stopped for speeding yesterday!
I THOUGHT I COULD TALK
MY WAY OUT OF IT, UNTIL THE OFFICER LOOKED AT
MY DOG IN THE BACK SEAT

DOG2a

howdy Have a great day….

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Saturday, December 14, 2013

Sunday, December 01, 2013

Sex or What for Funny Monday

Sex or What for Funny Monday

jtf This came in an email and I thought you might enjoy.

Facial expression interpretations are an important part of respected psychometric tests. In the following pictures you see women with a range of facial expressions. Study the expressions, and, try to imagine what single act each is experiencing:

sextest

Scroll down.

They are all about to sneeze!

And by the way......

drphil

Eye_opening_and_closing hope you enjoyed..Have a great day….

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EXTRA EXTRA EXTRA EXTRA

ADAMANDEVE1

“When God created Adam and Eve, He said:
I only have two gifts:...
One is the art of peeing standing ...And then Adam stepped forward and shouted: ME!, ME!, ME!,
I would love it please ... Lord, please, please!
Look, it will make my life substantially easier.
Eve nodded, and said those things did not matter to her. Then God gave Adam the gift and he began to shout for joy. He ran through the garden of Eden and used it to wet all the trees and bushes, ran down the beach making drawings with his pee in the sand ...
Well, he would not stop showing off.
God and Eve watched the man crazy with happiness and Eve asked God: What is the other gift? '  God answered:
Eve,..... a brain ... and it is for you ...!”

OLDLADYSAID That’s all folks…

Sex or What for Funny Monday (Don’t have a clue about photo credits)

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MQTlogoa