Funny Monday at My Quality Time

 Just hope to put a smile on your face..

 Have a great day..I’m going camping..

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The Coach and The Cell Phone

  After a basketball game, the coach found a cell phone on the gym floor.  He picked it up and handed it to one of the referees, saying, "Here's your phone." 
"What makes you think it's mine?" the ref
asked.  "Easy," the coach replied.  "It says you
missed 13 calls." 

That’s all for today..

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Paraprosdokians & The Back Roads of Ohio

A “Sunday Drive” post.

“A paraprosdokian /pærəprɒsˈdoʊkiən/ is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence, phrase, or larger discourse is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect.”

Some people are like Slinkies ... not really good for anything, but you can't help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.

Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.

 I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars but check when you say the paint is wet?

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

Some people hear voices. Some see invisible people. Others have no imagination whatsoever.

  I drove up to the one stoplight in a nearby town today and saw the entire police force (2?) with lights flashing, I studied the scene. On one side of the street, men are throwing straps over a semi load of hay. Further down 3 men are rolling one huge bale of hay down the street. "Wow!"  "I'm glad I quit drinking. Look at the tests they're giving now."

Paraprosdokians & The Back Roads of Ohio..  A “Sunday Drive” post.

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***All photos were taken near Lancaster,Ohio on Sunday 1/11/2015.. Many are near Clear Creek Metro Park*****

A Funny Monday Special from Australia "manyana"

From my Australian/New Zealand friend “Whitesnakes”

Spanish singer Julio Iglesias was on UK television with British TV host Anne Diamond.

He used the word "manyana" (pronounced "man -yana").

Diamond asked him to explain what it meant.

He said that the term means:
"Maybe the job will be done tomorrow;    Maybe the next day;
Maybe the day after that;     Or perhaps next week;    Next month;    Next year.    Who really cares?"

The host turned to Albert Yatapingu from the Gumbaingeri Tribe (aboriginal) who was also on the show.   She asked him if there was an equivalent term in his native language.

Eh" he replied. "In Australia we don't have a word to describe that degree of urgency."

 "Manyana" my new favorite “Quality Time” word.

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ONE MORE::

Little Johnny gets home from school and says "Dad, I've got a part in the school play as a man who's been married for 25 years."
His Dad replies "Never mind Johnny, Maybe next time you'll get a speaking part manyana!!"

Have a great day…

Friends at a bar .... for “Funny Monday”

Came In an Email.. thanks Charlie…  “Enjoy”

Friends at a bar ....

I pointed to two old drunks across the bar from us and told my friend, "That'll be us in ten years."

He turned to me and said, "That's a mirror, you dumb shit."

Should be good for a “Quality Time” laugh…… Have a great day

Technorati Tags: LAUGH,JOKE,MY QUALITY TIME,DRUNK

It’s October.. Celebrate

 Have a “QUALITY TIME” October…

First: Happy Birthday Dad.. Joseph B.  Fraker (1916 - 1998).. Born on October 3, 1916

Second: Janis Joplin’s Mercedes Benz.. Oct. 1, 1970 at the Sunset Sound recording studio in Los Angeles. Janis Joplin asks producer Paul Rothchild to roll tape. She has a song she’d like to sing. Read More

 

When I sing, I feel like when you're first in love. It's more than sex. It's that point two people can get to they call love, when you really touch someone for the first time, but it's gigantic, multiplied by the whole audience. I feel chills. Janis Joplin…….

Robert Service my favorite poet.

Third:: This year's National Poetry Day Thursday 2 October.  National Poetry Day is a British campaign to promote poetry, including public performances.  National Poetry Day was founded in 1994 by William Sieghart. It takes place annually in the UK and Ireland on the first Thursday of October. Since its inception, it has engaged millions of people across the country with live events, classroom activities and broadcasts. Read More ( Thank You U.K. )

The Men that Don't Fit In
by: Robert W. Service

There's A race of men that don't fit in,
A race that can't stay still;
So they break the hearts of kith and kin,
And they roam the world at will.
They range the field and they rove the flood,
And they climb the mountain's crest;
Theirs is the curse of the gypsy blood,
And they don't know how to rest.
If they just went straight they might go far,
They are strong and brave and true;
But they're always tired of the things that are,
And they want the strange and new.
They say: "Could I find my proper groove,
What a deep mark I would make!"
So they chop and change, and each fresh move
Is only a fresh mistake.
And each forgets, as he strips and runs
With a brilliant, fitful pace,
It's the steady, quiet, plodding ones
Who win in the lifelong race.
And each forgets that his youth has fled,
Forgets that his prime is past,
Till he stands one day, with a hope that's dead,
In the glare of the truth at last.
He has failed, he has failed; he has missed his chance;
He has just done things by half.
Life's been a jolly good joke on him,
And now is the time to laugh.
Ha, ha! He is one of the Legion Lost;
He was never meant to win;
He's a rolling stone, and it's bred in the bone;
He's a man who won't fit in.  READ MORE

AND::: I will leave you with this thought from a much younger Joe Todd…

Thanks for stopping by… I guess I’m still “out there” a wandering……

 Have a “QUALITY TIME” October…

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How do you fix a jack-o-lantern?
With a pumpkin patch.