Thursday, December 31, 2020
Balance Sheet Of Life & A Crow
If You Can Dream & A Cute Dog
"If you can wait, and not be tired by waiting...if you can dream, and not make dreams your master; if you can think, and not make thoughts your aim; if you can meet with Triumph and Disaster, and treat those two impostors just the same;...yours is the earth and everything that's in it..."
Wednesday, December 30, 2020
When I Retired & A Miracle
First A Joke::: When I retired, I went to the Social Security office to apply for
Charley, a new retiree-greeter at Wal-Mart, just couldn't seem to get to work on time. Every day he was 5, 10, 15 minutes late. But he was a good worker, really tidy, clean-shaven, sharp-minded and a real credit to the company and obviously demonstrating their "Older Person Friendly" policies.
Tuesday, December 29, 2020
The Last Obstacle of 2020
We Can Do It
Have Fun... Joe Todd..... One More Thought:: “The one thing we can never get enough of is love. And the one thing we never give enough of is love.”
Monday, December 28, 2020
Vancouver & A Feel Good Story
One day, when I was a freshman in high school,
I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.
His name was Kyle.
It looked like he was carrying all of his books.
I thought to myself, 'Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday?
He must really be a nerd.'
I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.
As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him.
They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt.
His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him...
He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes.
My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye.
As I handed him his glasses, I said, 'Those guys are jerks.'
They really should get lives.
' He looked at me and said, 'Hey thanks!'
There was a big smile on his face.
It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.
I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived.
As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before.
He said he had gone to private school before now.
I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.
We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books.
He turned out to be a pretty cool kid.
I asked him if he wanted to play a little football
With my friends.
He said yes.
We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.
Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again.
I stopped him and said, 'Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!
' He just laughed and handed me half the books.
Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends.
When we were seniors we began to think about college.
Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke.
I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never
Be a problem.
He was going to be a doctor and I was going for business on a football scholarship.
Kyle was valedictorian of our class.
I teased him all the time about being a nerd.
He had to prepare a speech for graduation.
I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak.
Graduation day, I saw Kyle.
He looked great.
He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school..
He filled out and actually looked good in glasses.
He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him.
Boy, sometimes I was jealous!
Today was one of those days.
I could see that he was nervous about his speech.
So, I smacked him on the back and said, 'Hey, big guy, you'll be great!'
He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled....
' Thanks,' he said.
As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began...
'Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years.
Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your friends....
I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them.
I am going to tell you a story.'
I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the first day we met.
He had planned to kill himself over the weekend.
He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home.
He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile.
'Thankfully, I was saved.
My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable.'
I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment.
I saw his Mom and Dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile.
Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.
Never underestimate the power of your actions.
With one small gesture you can change a person's life.
For better or for worse.
God puts us all in each others lives to impact one another in some way.
Look for God in others.
Have A Great Day & All That
Wednesday, December 23, 2020
Trains & Milk
One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay his way through school, found he had only one dime left, and he was hungry. He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door. Instead of a meal he asked for a glass of water.
She thought he looked hungry so brought him a large glass of milk. He drank it slowly, and then asked, “How much do I owe you?”
“You don’t owe me anything,” she replied. “Mother has taught us never to accept pay for a kindness.”
He said, “Then I thank you from my heart.” And he left.
Years later the young woman became critically ill. The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease. Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation. He did his best to save her life and gave his special attention to the case.
After a long struggle, the battle was won. The final bill from Dr. Kelly was sent to the woman’s room. She feared to open it, for she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all. Finally she had a look, and something caught her attention on the side of the bill. She read these words …
“Paid in full with one glass of milk”
A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas. After hearing about this extravagant gift, a friend of his said, “I thought she wanted one of those sporty four-wheel drive vehicles.” “She did,” he replied, “but where was I going to find a fake Jeep.”
Have A Great Day... Joe Todd
Tuesday, December 22, 2020
T'was 6 sleeps before Christmas
T'was 6 sleeps before Christmas, and all through the town, people wore masks, that covered their frown. The frown had begun way back in the spring when a global pandemic changed everything. They called it corona, but unlike the beer, It didn’t bring good times, it didn’t bring cheer. Airplanes were grounded, travel was banned. Borders were closed across air, sea, and land. As the world entered lockdown to flatten the curve, the economy halted, and folks lost their nerve. From March to July we rode the first wave, people stayed home, they tried to behave. When summer emerged the lockdown was lifted, but away from caution, many folks drifted. Now it’s December and cases are spiking, wave two has arrived, much to our disliking. It’s true that this year has had sadness a-plenty, we’ll never forget the year 2020. And just ‘round the corner - The holiday season, but why be merry? Is there even one reason? To decorate the house and put up the tree, who will see it, no one but me. But outside my window, the snow gently falls, and I think to myself, let’s deck the halls! So, I gather the ribbon, The garland, and bows, as I play those old carols, my happiness grows. Christmas is not canceled and neither is hope. If we lean on each other, I know we can cope
Merry Christmas family and friends!!!!
Sunday, December 20, 2020
A vacant room of dark spaces,
where furniture once lay
An empty lot of trash and cracked concrete
Where weeds take root with hopes of becoming trees
And cobwebs span for miles
Worn wind chimes still glisten in sun
Papers of bad handwriting fly with the wind
This place left unoccupied for so much time
Small lives make home in the walls,
While this home settles further beneath dirt
This place reminds me of our forgetfulness, our need to not rebuild
As a place turns old we leave it behind,
never to fix again,
never to feel loved again
Walls crying tears of yellow paint
Roof caving in feeling hollow
HopeYou Don't Feel Abandoned
Girls & Boys
“There is something about everything that you can be glad about, if you keep hunting long enough to find it.”
"People radiate what is in their minds and in their hearts. If a man feels kindly and obliging, his neighbors will feel that way, too, before long. But if he scolds and scowls and criticizes—his neighbors will return scowl for scowl, and add interest! When you look for the bad, expecting it, you will get it. When you know you will find the good—you will get that."
“Just breathing isn't living!”
“Be glad. Be good. Be brave.”
― Eleanor H. Porter
Have a Great Day Joe Todd
Saturday, December 19, 2020
A Little Amish and A Couple Jokes
At a hotel restaurant, a man sees an attractive woman sitting alone at the next table. Suddenly, she sneezes, and a glass eye comes flying out of her eye socket. It hurls by the man and he snatches it from the air and hands it back to her. “This is so embarrassing,” the woman says as she pops her eye back into place. “I’m sorry to have disturbed you. Let me buy dinner to make it up to you. May I join you?” The man nods. The woman is an excellent conversationalist, stunningly pretty, and the man finds they have a lot in common. He gets her number and asks, “You are the most charming woman I’ve ever met. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?” “No,” she said. “You just happened to catch my eye.”
Hope Your A Little Hungry Now LOL
Friday, December 18, 2020
Where Covid 19 Really Came From
"Nobody stands taller than those willing to stand corrected."
"When articulation is impossible, gesticulation comes to the rescue."
"A dependent clause is like a dependent child: incapable of standing on its own but able to cause a lot of trouble."
"A man who lies, thinking it is the truth, is an honest man, and a man who tells the truth, believing it to be a lie, is a liar."
“Is sloppiness in speech caused by ignorance or apathy? I don't know and I don't care.”
“The right to do something does not mean that doing it is right.”
"Last, but not least, avoid clichés like the plague."
― William Safire
That's All Folks Joe Todd
Thursday, December 17, 2020
The dumbest thing I ever bought was a 2020 planner & MORE.
Here are 12 things to consider as we get closer to closing the door on one of the most horrible years of our lifetime.
1. The dumbest thing I ever bought was a 2020 planner.
2. I was so bored I called Jake from State Farm just to talk to someone. He asked me what I was wearing.
3. 2019: Stay away from negative people. 2020: Stay away from positive people.
4. The world has turned upside down. Old folks are sneaking out of the house & their kids are yelling at them to stay indoors!
5. This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her dog. It was obvious she thought her dog understood her. I came into my house & told my cat. We laughed a lot.
6. Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.
7. Does anyone know if we can take showers yet or should we just keep washing our hands?
8. This virus has done what no woman has been able to do. Cancel sports, shut down all bars & keep men at home!
9. I never thought the comment, “I wouldn’t touch him/her with a 6-foot pole” would become a national policy, but here we are!
10. I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.
11. I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to the Backyard. I’m getting tired of the Living Room.
12. Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask & ask for money.
Enjoy The Snow LOL.........................Joe Todd
Wednesday, December 16, 2020
PEE ON THE ELECTRIC FENCE THEY SAID
I saw above me that endless skyway
As I went walking that ribbon of highway
Saw below me that golden valley
This land was made for you and me
I roamed and rambled and I've followed my footsteps
To the sparkling sands of her diamond deserts
All around me a voice was sounding
This land was made for you and me
~ Woody Guthrie