My Straight Jacket & I can’t get into your pants.

 

“A man who works with his hands is a laborer; a man who works with his hands and his brain is a craftsman; but a man who works with his hands and his brain and his heart is an artist.”

"Education is not the accumulation of knowledge, but the ability to find it."

“True religion is the life we lead, not the creed we profess.”

“Words of comfort, skillfully administered, are the oldest therapy known to man.”

"When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that four of his fingers are pointing at himself."

"In cross examination, as in fishing, nothing is more ungainly than a fisherman pulled into the water by his catch."

"A graceful taunt is worth a thousand insults."

― Louis Nizer

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Mike was going to be married to Jane, so his father sat him down for a little chat.

He said, ‘Mike, let me tell you something. On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants, handed them to your mother, and said, 'Here, try these on!

She did and said, 'These are too big, I can’t wear them.’

I replied, 'Exactly, I wear the pants in this family and I always will.’ Ever since that night we have never had any problems.

“Hmmm,’ said Mike. He thought that might be good thing to try. On his honeymoon, Mike took off his pants and said to Jane,

'Here try these on.’

She tried them on and said, 'These are too large, they don’t fit me.

'Mike said, 'Exactly, I wear the pants in this family, and I always will. I don’t want you to ever forget that.

Then Jane took off her pants, and handed them to Mike. She said, 'Here, you try on mine.’

He did and said, 'I can’t get into your pants.’

Jane said, 'Exactly. And if you don’t change your smart ass attitude, you never will.”

“They lived happily ever after”=====THE END====xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

SIDE SHOW::: ( My Pillow Guy )

“The GOP isn’t doomed. It’s dead.

The chaos now enveloping what’s left of the Grand Old party after four years of catering to an unstable president

is theirs to own. Where conservatism once served as a moderating force — gently braking liberalism’s boundless enthusiasm — the former home of ordered liberty has become a halfway house for ruffians, insurrectionists and renegade warriors.”

Have A Great Day.. J.T.

THE OPINIONS EXPRESSED IN THIS BLOG MAY OR MAYNOT BE MINE...

Question: Do you Eat Pizza For Breakfast? ( Hot or Cold )

 

“You can tell the size of a man by the size of the thing that makes him mad.”

“In America, anybody can be president. That's one of the risks you take.”

“What counts is not the years in your life but the life in your years.”

“Man is a strange animal, he doesn't like to read the handwriting on the wall until his back is up against it.”

“Patriotism is not short, frenzied outbursts of emotion, but the tranquil and steady dedication of a lifetime.”

“It is often easier to fight for one’s principles than it is to live up to them.”

― Adlai E. Stevenson II

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Survey from Facebook friends::: Majority of people will eat pizza for breakfast. Most prefer to eat it cold.... Thanks J.T.

Balance Sheet Of Life When Living With A Space Laser

 

Proper Use Of A Space Laser

see more::CLICK

That's All Folks... J.T.

“We must not wish for the disappearance of our troubles but for the grace to transform them.”

 “We must not wish for the disappearance of our troubles but for the grace to transform them.”

“Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.”

“If we look down into ourselves, we find that we possess exactly what we desire.”

“Human beings are so made that the ones who do the crushing feel nothing; it is the person crushed who feels what is happening. Unless one has placed oneself on the side of the oppressed, to feel with them, one cannot understand.”

“Compassion directed toward oneself is true humility.”

“Imagination and fiction make up more than three quarters of our real life.”

― Simone Weil

“Paid in full with one glass of milk” & A Few Train Photos

 

One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay his way through school, found he had only one dime left, and he was hungry. He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door. Instead of a meal he asked for a glass of water.

She thought he looked hungry so brought him a large glass of milk. He drank it slowly, and then asked, “How much do I owe you?”

“You don’t owe me anything,” she replied. “Mother has taught us never to accept pay for a kindness.”

He said, “Then I thank you from my heart.” And he left.

Years later the young woman became critically ill. The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease. Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation. He did his best to save her life and gave his special attention to the case.

After a long struggle, the battle was won. The final bill from Dr. Kelly was sent to the woman’s room. She feared to open it, for she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all. Finally she had a look, and something caught her attention on the side of the bill. She read these words …

“Paid in full with one glass of milk”

A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas. After hearing about this extravagant gift, a friend of his said, “I thought she wanted one of those sporty four-wheel drive vehicles.” “She did,” he replied, “but where was I going to find a fake Jeep.”

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Have A Great Day... Joe Todd

Plus, the head and the butt are interchangeable.”

 

Three surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on. The first surgeon said, “Electricians are the best because everything inside is color coded.” The second surgeon says, “No, I think librarians are, everything inside them is in alphabetical order.” The third surgeon shut them all up when he said, “You’re all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There’s no guts, no heart, no brains, and no spine. Plus, the head and the butt are interchangeable.”

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That's All Folks... J.T