Tuesday, September 17, 2019

Don't Pee In Your Pants

There was once a country boy who hated using the outhouse because it was hot in the summer and freezing in the winter...plus it stank all the time. The outhouse was situated on the bank of a creek and the boy determined that one day he would push that outhouse into the creek. So one day after a spring rain the creek was swollen so the little boy decided today was the day to push the outhouse into the creek. He got a large stick and started pushing. Finally, the outhouse toppled into the creek and floated away.  That night his dad told him they were going to the woodshed after supper. Knowing this meant a spanking, the little boy asked why. The dad replied, "Someone pushed the outhouse into the creek today. It was you, wasn't it, son?" The boy answered yes. Then he thought a moment and said, "Dad, I read in school today that George Washington chopped down a cherry tree and didn't get into trouble because he told the truth."  The dad replied, "Well, son, George Washington's father wasn't in that cherry tree."


Monday, September 16, 2019

Air Pressure

During a commercial airline flight an experienced Air Force Pilot was seated next to a young mother with a babe in arms.  When the baby began crying during   the descent for landing, the mother began nursing the infant as discreetly as possible.                                                        
The pilot pretended not to notice, and, upon disembarking, he gallantly                                          offered his assistance to help with the various baby-related items.
When the young mother expressed her gratitude, the pilot responded, "that's a good looking baby, and he sure was hungry!"
Somewhat embarrassed, the mother explained that her pediatrician said that the time spent on the breast would help alleviate the pressure in the baby's ears.
The Air Force Pilot sadly shook his head, and in true pilot fashion exclaimed,
"And all these years, I've been chewing gum." 

Sunday, September 15, 2019

Laugh or Not

An old man and woman were married for many years.          Whenever there was a confrontation, yelling could be heard deep  into the night.          The old man would shout: "When I die, I will dig my way up and  out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!"          Neighbors feared him. The old man liked the fact that he was  feared.          To everyone's relief, he died of a heart attack when he was 98.          His wife had a closed casket at the funeral.          After the burial, her neighbors, concerned for her safety,  asked: "Aren't you afraid that he may indeed be able to dig his way out  of the grave and haunt you for the rest of your life?"         The wife said, "Let him dig.  I had him buried upside down, and  I know he won't ask for directions."

Saturday, April 20, 2019

No Charge For Love

A farmer had some puppies he needed to sell. He painted a sign advertising the 4 pups and set about nailing it to a post on the edge of his yard. As he was driving the last nail into the post, he felt a tug on his overalls. He looked down into the eyes of a little boy.
"Mister," he said, "I want to buy one of your puppies."
"Mister," he said, "I want to buy one of your puppies.""Mister," he said, "I want to buy one of your puppies.""Well," said the farmer, as he rubbed the sweat off the back of his neck, "These puppies come from fine parents and cost a good deal of money."
The boy dropped his head for a moment. Then reaching deep into his pocket, he pulled out a handful of change and held it up to the farmer.
"I've got thirty-nine cents. Is that enough to take a look?"
"Sure," said the farmer. And with that he let out a whistle. "Here, Dolly!" he called.
Out from the doghouse and down the ramp ran Dolly followed by four little balls of fur. The little boy pressed his face against the chain link fence. His eyes danced with delight. As the dogs made their way to the fence, the little boy noticed something else stirring inside the doghouse.
Slowly another little ball appeared, this one noticeably smaller. Down the ramp it slid. Then in a somewhat awkward manner, the little pup began hobbling toward the others, doing its best to catch up...
"I want that one," the little boy said, pointing to the runt.
The farmer knelt down at the boy's side and said, "Son, you don't want that puppy. He will never be able to run and play with you like these other dogs would."
With that the little boy stepped back from the fence, reached down, and began rolling up one leg of his trousers. In doing so he revealed a steel brace running down both sides of his leg attaching itself to a specially made shoe. Looking back up at the farmer, he said, "You see sir, I don't run too well myself, and he will need someone who understands."
With tears in his eyes, the farmer reached down and picked up the little pup. Holding it carefully he handed it to the little boy.
"How much?" asked the little boy...
"No charge," answered the farmer, "There's no charge for love."

Have a Quality Time day..

Came in an email.... 

Sunday, February 24, 2019

True Friends...A Joke...And More


It occurred to Pooh and Piglet that they hadn't heard from Eeyore for several days, so they put on their hats and coats and trotted across the Hundred Acre Wood to Eeyore's stick house. Inside the house was Eeyore.
"Hello Eeyore," said Pooh.
"Hello Pooh. Hello Piglet," said Eeyore, in a Glum Sounding Voice.
"We just thought we'd check in on you," said Piglet, "because we hadn't heard from you, and so we wanted to know if you were okay."
Eeyore was silent for a moment. "Am I okay?" he asked, eventually. "Well, I don't know, to be honest. Are any of us really okay? That's what I ask myself. All I can tell you, Pooh and Piglet, is that right now I feel really rather Sad, and Alone, and Not Much Fun To Be Around At All. Which is why I haven't bothered you. Because you wouldn't want to waste your time hanging out with someone who is Sad, and Alone, and Not Much Fun To Be Around At All, would you now."
Pooh looked at Piglet, and Piglet looked at Pooh, and they both sat down, one on either side of Eeyore in his stick house.
Eeyore looked at them in surprise. "What are you doing?"
"We're sitting here with you," said Pooh, "because we are your friends. And true friends don't care if someone is feeling Sad, or Alone, or Not Much Fun To Be Around At All. True friends are there for you anyway. And so here we are."
"Oh," said Eeyore. "Oh." And the three of them sat there in silence, and while Pooh and Piglet said nothing at all; somehow, almost imperceptibly, Eeyore started to feel a very tiny little bit better.
Because Pooh and Piglet were There. No more; no less.
[and, sometimes that’s all it takes]
The above came in an email and I thought it was worth sharing.



Photo Corner

Jekyll Island is located off the coast of the U.S. state of Georgia, in Glynn County. It is one of the Sea Islands and one of the Golden Isles of Georgia barrier islands. The island is owned by the State of Georgia and run by a self-sustaining, self-governing body.

Linda says,  "Have a Quality Time Day"

Sunday, February 10, 2019

Hike At Christmas Rocks State Nature Preserve (A Repost)

MQTlogoa Another virtual hike at “My Quality Time.”

Middle top of Google earth view: The most spectacular feature at Christmas Rocks is the scenic vista from the top of the formation known as Jacob’s Ladder.
Orange: Jacobs Ladder Trail. The “r” in the word Ladder is about the top of the formation.
Start of the trail. The southerly loop has one climb called climbing Jacobs Ladder. It is not for the faint of heart but is worth the climb. The top holds a wonderful view of the entire valley. The entrance to Christmas Rocks is along a gravel access road.
At this point the trail veers right into the woods.
DSC_0066 looking back at the barn..
DSC_0067 Kiwanis building on the hill. Don’t know if it is still used or what.
DSC_0068 DSC_0073
Above photo: Arney Run is in the Streams category for Fairfield County in the state of Ohio. Arney Run is displayed on the Clearport USGS quad topo map. The approximate elevation is 820 feet (250 meters) above sea level.
Getting ready to start the Jacobs ladder loop trail.
The Jacobs Ladder rock formation sits about 200 feet above Arney Run. I would guess the rock formation itself is 60 to 70 feet tall.
DSC_0091 DSC_0093
Steepest part of trail. Stopped and took a break on the way up.
The top of that rock formation is where we are headed. this is a typical Hocking Hills Blackhand sandstone outcropping.
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DSC_0102 Just about there…
DSC_0114 The top… Yea……
Then the clouds came in to make for a little drama.
Read about Christmas Rocks at Moderately Active Ohio….. Time to head back down..
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Some top hikes in Ohio:
1. The 2-mile loop at Mill Creek Park in Youngstown
2. Lamping Homestead Trail in Graysville
3. Ash Cave at Hocking Hills State Park
4. Gorge Trail Metropark in Cuyahoga Falls
5. Lake Trail at Clear Creek Metropark in Franklin County
6. Monroe Overlook Trail at Wayne National Forest
7. Quail Hollow State Park Trail in Hartville
8. Christmas Rocks State Nature Preserve in Lancaster
Coming down was a lot easier than going up.
Heading back to the truck and heading home. Was a great hike. The temp was mid 40’s and I didn’t meet another sole on the trail.
DSC_0163 The sun comes out when the hike is over… Go figure………..
jtf1 Not to bad for an “old man”
Christmas Rocks State Nature Preserve & the Jacobs Ladder Trail
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