Andy Dufresne: Get busy living or get busy dying. Andy Dufresne: Remember, Red, hope is a good thing. Maybe the best of things and no good thing ever dies. WISDOM JOKES WISDOM JOKES AT MY QUALITY TIME BLOG WISDOM JOKES
During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer: “Look, I’ll give you $100 if you’ll change the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I’m supposed to promise to ‘love, honor and obey’ and ‘be faithful to her forever,’ I’d appreciate it if you’d just leave that out.” He passed the minister a $100 bill and walked away satisfied. On the day of the wedding, when it came time for the groom’s vows, the pastor looked the young man in the eye and said: “Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life, and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live? ”The groom gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, “Yes,” then leaned toward the pastor and hissed: “I thought we had a deal.” The pastor put a $100 bill into the groom’s hand and whispered: “She made me a better offer.”
A blonde walks into the police department looking for a job. The officer asks her some questions:
Officer: What's 2 + 2?
Blonde: Ummm... 4!
Officer: What's the square root of 100?
Blonde: Ummm... 10!
Officer: Good! Now, who killed Abraham Lincoln?
Blonde: Ummm... I dunno.
Officer: Well, you can go home and think about it. Come back tomorrow.
The blonde goes home and calls up one of her friends, who asks her if she got the job.
The blonde replies excitedly, "Not only did I get the job, I'm already working on a murder case!"
NOW FOR SOME WISDOM
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Today's Quotes
“Whatever the cost of our libraries, the price is cheap compared to that of an ignorant nation.”
“In seeking truth you have to get both sides of a story.”
“Freedom of the press is not just important to democracy, it is democracy.”
“We are not educated well enough to perform the necessary act of intelligently selecting our leaders.”
“America's health care system is neither healthy, caring, nor a system.”
“Success is more permanent when you achieve it without destroying your principles.”
Today's Quotes::::"Assumptions are the termites of relationships."
"How we learn has nothing to do with how brilliant we are."
"A human being's first responsibility is to shake hands with himself."
"You cannot represent cool. You've got to be cool. You've got to be authentic. I think, after all these years, that is how I define cool. It is being authentic. That is powerful."
"Ten out of ten people die, so don't take life too seriously."
"Your mind knows only some things. Your inner voice, your instinct, knows everything. If you listen to what you know instinctively, it will always lead you down the right path."
Mildred,the church gossip and self-appointed monitor of the church’s morals, kept sticking her nose into other people’s business. Several members did not approve of her extra-curricular activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence. She made a mistake, however, when she accused Jake, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she seen his old pickup parked in front of the town’s only bar one afternoon. She emphatically told Frank (and several others) that everyone seeing it there would know what he was doing! Jake, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just turned and walked away. He didn’t explain, defend, or deny. He said nothing. Later that evening, Jake quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred’s house, walked home, and left it there all night.
A man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy street (Mildred).
Suddenly, the light turned yellow just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at ...the crosswalk.
The tailgating woman hit the roof, and the horn, screaming as she missed her chance to get through the intersection.
As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a police officer.
He took her to the police station where she placed in a holding cell.
After a couple of hours, the policeman opened the cell door and said, "I'm very sorry for this mistake.
You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you, and cussing a blue streak at him.
I noticed the 'What Would Jesus Do?' bumper sticker, the 'Follow Me to Sunday School' bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk.
Naturally, I assumed you had stolen the car!"
MY QUALITY TIME BLOG #WISDOM #JOKES & TRAVEL
Primitive Baptist Church Historical Building
The Primitive Baptist Church, which was originally established in 1827,
Since the Primitive Baptist Church backed the Union during the Civil War, the church decided it was too dangerous to meet during the Civil War due to the strong Confederate presence in the area. Read More
"You don't have to act as if you care; you just have to care enough to act."
"Part of me is still waiting to grow up, to be an adult, and the other part knows there is no such thing."
"I'm nothing if not honest."
"I really think that living is the process of going from complete certainty to complete ignorance."
"By telling my own story, I hope to help remove the stigma. It never should be something to hide."
- Richard Dreyfuss
MY QUALITY TIME BLOG #WISDOM #JOKES & TRAVEL
An Alabama pastor said to his congregation, "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumour that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan.
This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed, and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who said this to stand and ask forgiveness
from God and this Christian family."
No one moved. The preacher continued, "Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression." Again, all was quiet.
Then, slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop a runaway train rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke,
"Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets.".........
Beautiful English::: I called an old school friend and asked what was he doing. He replied that he is working on "Aqua-thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminium and steel under a constrained environment".
I was impressed......
On further enquiring I learnt that he was washing dishes with hot water.....under his wife's supervision.
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